Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock. The brunette balances their checkbook, then takes their last $600 dollars out west to another ranch where a man has a prize bull for sale.
Upon leaving, she tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home."
The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she does want to buy it. The man tells her that he can sell it for $599, no less.
After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news. She walks into the telegraph office, and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."
The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word."
Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word. After thinking for a few minutes, she nods, and says, "I want you to send her the word, 'comfortable.'"
The telegraph operator shakes his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her the word, 'comfortable'?"
The brunette explains, "My sister's blonde, she'll read it very slow."
The blonde was speeding down the road and a blonde cop pulls her over and asks to see her drivers license. The Blonde driver replies with "Whats a drivers license?" "It's a little square thing that looks like you", said the cop.
So the blonde looks through her purse and she pulls out a compact mirror and gives it to the cop.
The blonde cop looks at it and says, "Well if you would of told me you were a cop in the first place, I never would have pulled you over!"
Blonde on a path by a canal spots another blonde on the other side. She calls out "Hello, can you tell me how I get to the other side?" Blonde numbre two shouts back "You are already on the other side"
This blonde wanted to go ice fishing so she got her tools and went to the nearest frozen lake. When she got there she started poking a hole into the ice, and a deep booming voice was heard from the skies and said to her, "There are no fish under the ice."
So the blonde moved to the right and starts to poke another hole. Again, the deep booming voice spoke, and again said the same thing, "There are no fish under the ice".
The blonde put down her tools, looked up towards the heavens and said, "Is that you lord?"
The deep booming voice spoke to her and said, "No. This is the manager of the ice rink!"
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