There was a mexican, american, and a asian. They all went out to hunt. The asian went out and came back with a rabbit on his back. The Mexican asked how did u get that then the asian replied, "i heard the sound then i followed the tracks then BOOM got myself a rabbit." So the mexican went out and came back with a deer on his back and the American asked how did u get that and so the mexican replied, "i heard the sound then i followed the tracks then BOOM got myself a deer." So the American went out and was out for a long period of time so the mexican and the asian went out to look for him. Then they found him almost dead on the train tracks. They asked what happened. He replied, " i heard the sound followed the tracks then BOOM got hit by a train."
An Alabama cop was driving down the road when he saw a car in a ditch. He stopped to look around, took out his notepad and wrote "car in ditch". The he walked up to the road and saw a human head. He took out his notebook again and wrote "head on Threw... head on thro... head on thru...
then he kick the head into the ditch and wrote head in ditch.
Year after year Bubba's wife pleaded with him to take her fishing but he kept telling her she would not enjoy it. She, finally, wore him down, he consented, and early one morning they took off to the lake. They had not been there very long when the fish began biting. Almost as fast as they cast, a fish would bite, and they reeled it in. After catching their limit, Bubba said, Martha, sweet thang, I'm sorry. You've been good luck and I'm gonna bring you with me the next time. If you'll mark the spot where we caught all these fish, we'll go home.
On the way home, Bubba turned to Verna Lou and said, Sweet thang, how did you mark the spot were all the fish are so next time I'll know? Bubba, darlin', I put a big 'X' on the side of the boat right down closest to the water. Sweet thang, that's about the dumbest thing I ever seed you do. Don't you know that won't work? We may not get the same boat the next time!
There were 3 3rd graders, an asian a mexican, and a redneck. they're thinking up games for next recess. the asian says how about who has the biggest wee-wee. they say okay. the next recess they say how do you play that? just unzip your pants and see whose is the biggest. so the asian unzips his pants and the other two are amazed. so does the mexican and his is the same size as the asian. the redneck does it and the others say wow! you surely win. so when school is over the redneck says to his mom, mom we played this cool game in recess called who has the biggest wee-wee and the other two said that I won because I was a redneck. and his mom says no, honey you won because your 23.
A young West Virginian girl wanted to go to
college at UVA. But her father said ' No Way!
You're going to By-God West Virginia Univ.'
Well she got her way and she went to UVA. The
first semester went by, and she wrote home that
she was getting married to, a man from Richmond,
VA named Clarence. Her father said ' I'll be
damned if my daughter is marrying a man from
Richmond, you're marrying a By-God West Virginian
boy.'
So he sent his two sons to UVA to get their
sister. In a couple of days they returned. Dad
said ' Where is your sister?'
They replied ' We were almost there Daddy and we
came up on this overpass that had this sign that
read 'Clarence 13'6'' so we turned around and got
the hell out of there.'
Tom, Dick and Harry were in the pub enjoying a few quiet drinks
one night, when they decided to get in on the weekly raffle. They
bought five $1 tickets each, seeing it was for charity. The
following week, when the raffle was drawn, they each won a prize.
Tom won the first prize - a whole year's supply of gourmet
spaghetti sauce. Dick was the winner of the second prize - six
month's supply of extra-long gourmet spaghetti. And Harry won the
sixth prize - a toilet brush.
When they met in the pub a week later, Harry asked the others how
they were enjoying their prizes.
"Great," said Tom. "I love spaghetti."
"So do I," said Dick. "And how's the toilet brush, Harry?"
"Not so good," Harry said, "I reckon I'll go back to paper..."
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